6 Secrets of Happy People
The other day I heard the song, “Happy” by Pharrell Williams and it made me smile and got me thinking about the characteristics of happy people.
Some people are hard-wired to be happy most of the time. These are the people who have a zest for life, they are energized, smile, and laugh more often and focus on making things pleasant for others. What do happy people do differently?
1) They focus on the present.
Happy people focus most of their attention on what is happening right now rather than obsessing about the past or future. They know that whatever happened in the past, needs to stay in the past. They learn from their mistakes and failures in the past but don’t dwell on their regrets. Instead, they make the most of their situation. This is the opposite of what most people do.
If you find yourself focusing your energy on your past failures and mistakes, find a way to let go so you can focus on what is in front of you, right at this very moment. Think about what you’ve learned and how it will help you. If you don’t do this, you won’t learn and grow. Also, you will likely miss opportunities in the present and then you will add more to your long list of regrets.
2) They’re optimistic about the future
Happy people aren’t naïve. They recognize that the future is important. They can’t simply live in the present, and not have future plans. They’re optimistic about what the future holds, and they look for ways to work towards their future goals, celebrating their progress along the way. They also take a realistic view, and this allows them to proactively address setbacks when they happen.
Happy people also know how to balance their perspective on the future, so they don’t spin themselves into the frenzy of “what-if” thinking. So, what do I mean by this? This is when people obsess about the future and focus on all the things that could go wrong to the point where they no longer see what is working. The negative mindset can paralyze them from acting or become a self-fulfilling prophecy for negative outcomes.
3) They have a sense of personal control.
Happy people have an internal locus of control. In other words, they believe that they can control their destiny. Happy people don’t make excuses or blame others when things go wrong; they believe that they choose their path, and their actions will control their outcomes. When they make a mistake, they learn from it and move forward. They focus on the things that they can control and have learned to let go of the things they can’t control or influence.
4) They surround themselves with positive influences.
Happy people tend to minimize their time with negative and pessimistic people because they would rather be with people who are positive, friendly, and fun. Attitudes are contagious so it makes sense that the more positive people you are around, the happier you will be.
Happy people also tend to do things that bring them joy – engaging in hobbies and exposing themselves to things that are motivational or inspirational rather than draining and negative.
5) Happy people know how to go with the flow.
Happy people don’t dwell on whatever negative thing is happening to them right now. They know how to take it all in stride and find the positive or the humor in the situation. When facing adversity, happy people decide to engage in more positive thoughts than negative thoughts. They choose to demonstrate a positive, can-do attitude. They ask themselves what they can do rather than feeling sorry for themselves and getting upset about the circumstances they are facing.
6) Happy people count their blessings and make things pleasant for those around them.
Gratitude is often overlooked in the quest for happiness. It is easy to look beyond the good things you have and wish for things that you don’t have. Happy people appreciate what they have and don’t take it for granted. They appreciate their health, their family, and friends. They also enjoy the little moments in their lives and are grateful for them. Happy people also take the time to appreciate the people around them, saying “please” and “thank you” and authentically making others feel better about themselves.
If you want to be happier, look for ways to incorporate these practices into your daily routine.
Resources:
HuffPost “9 Secrets of Happy People” by Shawn Doyle
Psychology Today “The Secrets of Happiness” by David G. Myers